Kurt: I feel like Eloise!
Brittany: I have pills for that.

Heather Morris is such an outstanding dancer that your eye always goes right to her. Like Gene Kelly in everything he was ever in.

Dustin (about his team): I hate my kids. I would literally whip them if I could. ...
Will: I love my kids.
Dustin: What? No, you don't. They're hideous. My kids are at least attractive. Yours look like they haven't been baked properly.