Funny I recently fumed that I almost never need a printer but when I do I need it BAD and RIGHT AWAY, which I resent because I hate them, and sought recommendations, which though appreciated were uniformly unsatisfactory (none being (1) free (2) zero footprint (3) zero maintenance (4) ink-free (5) lifetime-guaranteed). In its litany of complaints this article doesn't even mention my most vexing problem, which is that the many printers I've owned have, as if by secret pre-arrangement, stopped working entirely 3 months or 10 pages in (whichever comes sooner), sheerly out of pique (if there's another reason, I haven't discovered it).