
when the reality was

but I digress. The only part that even made me smile:
It was surprising how much milk that goat could consume. It looked as if it were Captain's intention to fill the goat to bursting point. ... Though I had by this time been forced to get used to the proximity of the goat, I began to hope that the goat might explode loudly with the quantities of the milk inside him and when that happened they would surely pass him on to me as they would have no further use for him.In other news, I still despise Flash. I don't need a feature-film style experience for everything I do online, any more than I want to follow on Twitter every business I do or might patronize.
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